Spring Break
You're nobody till somebody hates you
palindromes
By: Jordan Axt
Issue date: 10/26/07 Section: Columns
Last update: 10/26/07 at 7:24 AM EST
Last update: 10/26/07 at 7:24 AM EST
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Page's amazing story first surfaced online two weeks ago, and if you haven't heard of him yet, I pity you. Page is an actor/model/personal trainer/investment banker living in Atlanta who is also not above online dating. The world knows who John is because of a now-infamous e-mail exchange he had with a potential romantic partner.
Page's Match.com account, IvyLeagueAlum, was "winked"-think Facebook poked-by a woman online. Page answered the woman's gesture by immediately replying, "I went to an Ivy league school... where did you go to school? What activities do you currently participate in to stay in shape? I work out four times a week at LA Fitness."
But wait, there's more. Much more. Soon, Page received a polite "no thank you" from his Match.com partner. This apparently did not sit well with the Wharton alum, who angrily responded that "the next time you meet a guy of my caliber, instead of trying to turn it around, just get to the gym! I will even give you one free training session so you don't blow it with the next Mensa member, can bench/squat/leg press over 1200 lbs, has had lunch with the secretary of defense... drives a Beemer convertible. Oh that is right, there aren't any more of those!"
Here is where most readers decide that it's because of people like Page that God doesn't talk to us anymore. In the Mt. Rushmore of evil, John snuggles somewhere between Hitler and the guy who decided that Curriculum 2000 was a good idea.
There are plenty of reasons to hate Page. His idea of a conversation is reading you his resume. He treats dating like a Darwinistic survival of the fittest. Yet, the intensity of my hatred for John Fitzgerald Page goes much deeper than his revolting online dating tactics. The primary force behind my disgust is found in Page's own response to all this unwanted attention.
On his personal Web site, where adoring "fans" can examine pictures of a shirtless Page displaying his muscles or find out what celebrities look most like him, Page describes how he has dealt with his 15 minutes of fame. At times, Page seems endearing and genuinely apologetic. He recounts how becoming "an overnight Internet pariah" has turned his life into "a living hell." He hates the fact that "everything I have ever worked for in my life has been sullied in one day, by one person, whom I have never met." He apologizes for "sending a not very nice e-mail" but does not understand why he was so vilified for his actions. In all, Page's reaction to his newfound fame is refreshingly heartfelt and remorseful.
Viewing Comments 1 - 3 of 3
Bob H
posted 10/26/07 @ 10:33 AM EST
You have a lot of hate in you for some disembodied cybernaut.
Jack McGinnity
posted 10/26/07 @ 10:35 AM EST
Is this the best you can do with the privilege of having a platform for your personal views?
Joe
posted 10/26/07 @ 11:30 AM EST
I understand your frustration with people like him. But try not to get too flustered. It helps to operate a just a little outside the rules with guys like this. (Continued…)
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